The Role Reversals of Life (In Need of God's Grace)

Without getting into too many details, these past couple of weeks have been very, very hard for my family and me.  My 85 year old dad who, up until the beginning of the year was relatively healthy, active, and independent, was suddenly hospitalized and is now facing some very difficult health issues—illness that will gravely affect whatever time he has left in this life.  These past couple of weeks, my siblings and I have spent much of our time with my dad in the hospital and now in a rehabilitation-nursing facility—all while trying to also take care of our mom (and our own families and jobs). 

For me, the hardest part of it all is seeing the man who to me was so strong and invincible now so frail and in need.  It is strange for me to have to help him get up out of a wheelchair to get to the bathroom, to help him wash his face or brush his teeth, or have to watch over him as he eats his meals.  He was the one who always took care of us. He was the provider, protector, teacher, coach, motivator, disciplinarian, etc.  In my mind, it’s not supposed to be the other way around. 

But, life has a way of switching things around; we all face it in one way or another.  The provider becomes the one in need. The one who once was cared for, is now the caregiver.   The protector needs protection.  The child becomes like a parent to his or her own parent.  And, it’s all very hard to face. In fact, it feels very sad.  We don’t want life to pull out its unending reversals. We want life to stay as it was or is.  When it comes to my parents, I want to be the child. When it comes to my children, I want to be the parent. Unfortunately, however, we have little say in the way time affects the roles we play in life. 

Through all of this I am learning how important the grace of God is to our lives—grace to strengthen us; grace to help us face those things that comes our way; grace to keep us from being overwhelmed. I need grace to face the reversals. I am realizing how much I need to rest in the words the Lord spoke to the Apostle Paul during his times of physical trial: “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”  (2 Corinthians 12:9 – NIV)

No matter what side of the equation I am on—parent or child; caregiver or the one in need—the best I can do is to rely on God’s grace. I am in need of “the riches of his grace.” (Ephesians 2:7) today and every day. I am sure that the same is true for you as well.  

“And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.”

Have a grace-filled day!

Pastor Tim Harris

www.pifny.org